1. It keeps me looking back: all the “what ifs”, “maybes”, “who knows” etc has me stuck in one moment in time while the object of my fantasy is moving forward.
  2. It makes me an absent participant in my life: There are real time problems that require my attention, real time emotional puzzles I need to work on, real time goals I should be setting, but because I keep looking to a time that doesn’t exist, I am not giving myself room to solve them.
  3. It keeps me from making room for something new: my fantasies are so grounded in the past, I haven’t yet discovered who I have evolved into, as a result of the learnings from my mistakes. What new me has emerged? How do I cater to her? What questions is she bringing up, whose answers I need to find? All of these are magical discoveries I am keeping from myself because my time is still set to yesterday.




Writer, Clinical Psychologist

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Aanu Jide-Ojo

Aanu Jide-Ojo

Writer, Clinical Psychologist

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